All I Want For Christmas

If we could all have our wishes come true in this life, what would yours be?

I know what mine would be. I’d wish for you both to come back to me.

You see, your mummy decided to take you out of my life a year ago when she asked the courts to stop me from being with you. Since then, things have worsened, with all contact between us being cut off.

Your mummy and I have not been in a great place for a while, but we tried to give you a good start in life. We promised to travel the selfless journey of parenthood together from the moment we laid eyes on you both. The hardest thing for me is to forgive myself for allowing this promise to be broken, leaving you without your daddy.

I wish I could turn back time.

My life has been full of wishes, and to say I’ve been blessed up until this nightmare began is a very truthful statement.

The memory of your births will never leave me. When I first laid my eyes on you both, I couldn’t quite understand how your mummy and I had created such perfect little people from scratch. Even to this moment, this memory still brings tears to my eyes.

A parent’s love reaches above and beyond anything else we feel as humans. My love for you has always been my strength, and my passion is to ensure you are happy and safe.

So right now, I wish I could hug you both as I used to whenever either of you were having a bad day, because I feel these days aren’t the best ones for any of us.

This Christmas will be empty without your morning cuddles and shrieks of excitement. It will not be the same without your laughter and conversations echoing through the house. You are my best friends, my laughter, my reason for believing in true love and most of all, you are both my reason for living. I wake up every morning hoping that my wishes come true and that my only wish for Christmas is to have you both come home.

To all the mothers and fathers reading this who have been alienated from their children, don’t give up hope; one day, the truth will be known.

To my own beautiful children, I hope to see you both very soon, and I hope your mummy has a change of heart. We are all human; humans make mistakes, and sometimes anger can cloud our judgment.

Your mummy is a good woman, and I will never say a bad word about her, even though she has been so cruel in her actions. I know the only people hurt by horrible statements and accusations in all this mess will be the two little people who matter the most.

Some day you will grow older, and someday, you may come across these stories and letters and wonder why?

Your memories of me, and all the wonderful things we did, will stay with you until you are old enough to find the answers for yourself.

So, my wish will stay as it is until I see those glimmering big brown and blue eyes and hear your beautiful voices again.

Love Daddy xx